SIMPLE WAYS TO HAVE BETTER CONVERSATIONS

Practical Tools for Families and Couples

There is a good chance that not too long ago, you desired more time with your family, partner, or spouse.  The combination of work schedules, school activities, practice schedules, and extracurricular events made you feel like ships passing in the night.  

Take a moment right now and ask yourself, “How are the conversations with those people going?”  Are you evening having conversations with the most important people in your life? 

Here are a few simple ways to have better conversations. 

When you are with your family or partner, and there is enough time for a more in-depth discussion (mealtime, a long walk, a road trip), let them know you want to try a different way of having a conversation. 

1.     Ask them if they would be willing to try a new type of conversation.  Don’t just assume they are ready to try something new because you are ready.  

2.     If they are willing, explain there are a couple of rules. 

• Each person gets a chance to talk about all four topics. 

• While the person is speaking, no one interrupts, judges, or offer solutions. This is a gift to the one speaking and will allow him or her freedom to talk about what’s important

3.     Cover the 4 topics

• Gratitude: Who and/or what are you thankful? It can be anything as long as it’s expressed with thanksgiving. 

• Important Information: What information do the other people need?  It could be schedule related.  It could be about another family member.  It could be an upcoming event.  Pass important information to those listening.

• Issues of Concern with Solutions: What are the issues or problems you want to talk about, and what are your solutions to the issues or concerns?  It’s important not to raise a concern unless you have a potential solution. 

• Dreams and Hopes: Express your dreams and hopes about the future.  Expressing those things help the other person or the family know the things you are striving to accomplish.  

Remember, this is a time for sharing and not a time to interrupt, fix, offer solutions or judge. 

After everyone is done sharing, and if there are things you want to talk about more in-depth, ask the person when a good time would be to talk about something they mentioned.   

Gives these simple steps a try and see if it results in better conversations. 

If you want to learn conversation tools or ways to improve your relationship, don’t hesitate to contact me.  I would love to help! 

Until Next Time!